The trials of young love, well more specifically, if we’re going to get scientific, —the laws of attraction. I am no connoisseur of dating, as everyone must already know but I have been frequently reviewing the same concept in my head for weeks. What is it, you may ask yourself. You’re guilty of it, as am I and perhaps all the people we know. So here it goes: taking pride in breaking someone’s heart. Traditionally, heartbreak is gruesome, gut wrenching. You replay every good moment you ever shared with the person, constantly rewinding, pausing and analyzing for an insight as to what went wrong. Let’s backtrack --the breakup, the person who dumped you. In some cases, the person genuinely feels guilty, takes time to thoroughly explain him or herself, and lets you down gently. In others, it hits you like a speeding truck, no explanation, no sorrow, and no remorse. Though both don’t ever offer you the peace of mind you desire, you take the cards you have been dealt and try to move on to the best of your ability. Random sex, binge eating, flirting with the next pretty young thing- all pitiful attempts which leave you sitting at home alone cursing that bitch or bastard’s name, making you feel even more pathetic. Fast-forward five months. You find something that reminds you of that person. You reach to pick up the phone, just a silly little phone call, perhaps a text just to be nonchalant. Best-case scenario, you get a polite response and go on your merry ways. Though when the thought of you comes to them, let’s say- in a conversation with their friends they will make no hesitation to boast over the fact that they “let you down easy,” they “hated to do it” but just had to cut ties, they were the puppeteer of the heartstrings you once wanted to be played. Why is that? Are our egos so big that making someone crumble is enjoyable? A large majority of us have uttered, “I have him/her wrapped around my finger,” or “I have this one on lock.” Do you need that power and sense of superiority to contribute to a relationship? I suppose it’s a part of human nature to keep our vulnerability at bay. When someone reveals them self to us at that level, you take advantage and keep their feelings in your back pocket. I know people who take pride in the fact that if it ever so happened they wanted to step away from their partner, they would walk away unscathed, the other one would be devastated but not them, they could find a replacement in minutes. Since when has dating become like owning a car? You make all the payments, get the oil changed regularly, go to the car wash every two weeks, but in case there’s a crash, you always have insurance.
-Valerie Sullivan
